Hey friends! Are you looking for some best Lame jokes. Then you are at the right place. Here we provide you the best collection of Lame Jokes. these jokes definitely make you and your friends laugh. So share these jokes with your friends, family.. on Whatsapp and Facebook… share jokes share love.. enjoy!

 Lame Jokes

Why can’t a bike stand up on it’s own?
Because it’s two tired.
I’d like to give a big shout out to all the sidewalks for keeping me off the streets.
Why can’t you trust trees?
Because they are shady.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
Why do shoemakers go to heaven?
Because they have good soles.
Why did the baker stop making doughnuts?
He got tired of the hole thing!
Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre
Why can’t pirates finish the alphabet?
Because they got lost at C!
What did Barack Obama say to Michelle when he proposed?
I don’t wanna be Obama self.
How did the dentist become a brain surgeon?
His hand slipped.
What do you call the security outside of a Samsung Store?
Guardians of the Galaxy.
What do you call an alligator that reads maps?
A navigator.
“Knock knock”
“Who’s there?”
“Europe”
“Europe who?”
“No you’re a poo!”
Why was the cellphone wearing glasses?
Because he lost all his contacts.
Have you ever watched the movie “Constipated”?
It hasn’t come out yet.
Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke?
Joke joke jooooke.
Why do seagulls live by the sea?
Because if they lived by the bay they’d be bagels!
Why doesn’t Pac-Man use Twitter?
He doesn’t like being followed.
My dog has no nose.
So how does he smell?
Awful.
If you ever get cold, just stand in a corner for a bit.
They’re usually 90 degrees.
How does Moses make his tea?
Hebrews it.
Two peanuts were walking down a spooky road at night.
One was assaulted.
Why can’t you trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
Why did the hipster fall in the lake?
He went ice skating before it was cool.
A termite walks into a bar room and asks, “Is the bar tender here?”
What did one plate say to the other?
Lunch is on me.
What did the vegetables say at the party?
Lettuce turnip the beet!
“Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud.”
“Yes sir, it’s fresh ground.”
Can February March?
No, but April May.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
Bison.
What did the apple say to the orange?
Nothing, apples don’t talk.
I had a fear of speed bumps, but I’m slowly getting over it.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.
What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him out for a drag.
Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors?
Because if it had 4 doors it would be a chicken sedan.
Why was Cinderella kicked off the softball team?
Because she kept running from the ball.
Famous last words of a mafia hitman.
“Who put the violin in the violin case?”
What do a base ball team and a pancake have in common?
They both need a good batter.
What’s the best thing about living in Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus!
How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb?